I meet a wide variety of Christians in my line of work. Some inspire me to live and love so much better than I would without their influence. Honestly, others leave me feeling depleted. What is the difference amongst them?
The Attractive Attribute
One outstanding contrast is the attractive, magnetic quality of gentleness. I don’t mean timidity or weakness. I mean the ability to resist treating others with condescension, severity and volatility, which can make people feel overlooked, underestimated, or silenced.
The Power
Paul described the most powerful and perfect person to ever walk the earth, as ‘gentle’ (2 Corinthians 10:1). He was describing Jesus. Paul also listed gentleness as one of the proofs of a life filled with the Spirit (Galatians 5:22-23). The fruit of the Spirit, including gentleness, are markers of wholeness along the inSPIRE journey.
It should not surprise us that immediately after begging the Ephesians to live worthy of their calling as Christ-followers, Paul called them to “always be humble and gentle” (Ephesians 4:2 NLT).
Paul flipped the script on what it means for the mighty power of God to be at work in us, the power that leads us to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think (Ephesians 3:20).
The History
The ancient philosopher, Aristotle, was another surprising voice for the virtue of gentleness. Despite living in a fierce culture where gentleness would not be considered a desirable trait, Aristotle raised the sword of gentleness as a strength. He would have defined gentleness as a position between excessive anger and the absence of anger.
Even today, the words of Aristotle and the Apostle Paul encourage us to flip the script on our reactive media posts, our family fights, and difficult relationships.
Let’s be sure to understand that gentleness does not mean that we don’t feel things. When we are insulted, betrayed, or hurt, we will feel the pain. Gentleness means that we can respond, in our passions, in a Christ-like way. This is not easy to do. Our Christ-like response might look very different from our natural human response.
A quote attributed to the fifth-century BCE Greek historian, Thucydides, still challenges me today.
“The greatest demonstration of strength is in its restraint.”
The Ultimate Example
Jesus led the way in restraint. With arms outstretched on a Roman cross, Jesus held back the wrath of God, due not only to his murderers, but to you and me. Our sin put him there.
On that cross, through swollen eyes, covered with the blood from thorns pressed into his brow, Jesus caught sight of his mother. With parched lips barely opening in a tortured face, he made one last request, not for himself, but for her. He asked the disciple he loved to care for her, when he would be gone (John 19:25-27). The gospel writer, Luke, adds that Jesus spoke forgiveness for his enemies, and welcomed a repentant criminal into the Kingdom, in those agonizing, final moments (Luke 23:34, 43).
Jesus consistently showed us the way of gentleness and compassion throughout his life and death.
My Pain Response
When you are experiencing your greatest hurt or pain, how will you react? For me, I suspect it will be a lot like how I respond to much more daily, ordinary annoyances. I know that I have a long way to go, as I consider this Emotional component of the SPIRE and the example of Jesus. I can still think of influence for the kingdom in wrong, up-side-down ways.
I want my script flipped, and my life to be full of this fruit of the Spirit, and others. That is why I continue the journey to wholeness. I am in anticipation of all that I will learn, and the ways that God will guide me to grow in strength and gentleness.